An Emerald Anniversary... by Barbara (Ruth)

In nineteen hundred and fifty-six

A guy had fun taking some pics

Of a couple that newly married were.

Oh! How they all admired her!

I wrote that and about 20 additional stanzas back in 1981. The resulting poem was my present to my parents on their 25th anniversary. My friend Kelly did beautiful calligraphy for me, and I read the whole thing out to my family. It's hard to believe that was 30 years ago, and tomorrow is the 55th anniversary of my parents' wedding day.

May 19, 1956. Southminster United Church in Ottawa, ON.

They met, so the story goes, in 1954 at a drive-in theatre in Fredericton, NB. Mum had paint in her hair, and met Dad through her sister, whose husband was a good friend of Dad's. Two weeks later, Mum knew that she would marry my Dad. 

Their engagement picture, taken in Kingston, ON.

The reception at my Grandmother's house in Ottawa, ON. 

Honeymoon in Bermuda!

My Mum made ALL those dresses!

Don't they look like movie stars?

My parents' anniversary has always been celebrated with a minimum of fuss. Dad used to give Mum one red rose for every 10 years, and one yellow rose for every single year. (Yes, this means she only got an even dozen roses on her 39th and 48th anniversaries, but she liked the sentiment.) We had a party on their 30th, but other than that, they prefer to celebrate on their own. Yet no matter how much they try to keep things low key, one or more of their daughters will sing the dreaded "Happy Anniversary" song over and over and over again. Today my sister Janet helped Dad buy some roses, and will no doubt sing to them with gusto when she visits them tomorrow.

I don't want to write a big long post about what their 55 years have been like. After all, what do I know of the realities of their marriage? I do know they raised four successful daughters, built warm and loving homes in Hawkesbury (near Ottawa, ON), Monroe (near NYC, NY), and Mississauga (near Toronto, ON). They both have had more than their fair share of sickness, but also lots of health. And although they started of "for poorer", now with 3 sons-in-law and 7 grandchildren, they certainly feel "for richer".

Happy Anniversary Mum and Dad! I hope it's a wonderful day full of warm memories, roses, and maybe even a little sunshine (if Mother Nature would only cooperate!)

xoxo Love, R.

Things I Want to Do This Summer... by Barbara (Ruth)

Angela picked a cool topic for this week's "Twofer Monday" Blog. I like to think of it as a proactive version of "things I did on my summer vacation". Perhaps it appeals to the planner in me, perhaps it's because I'm so happy that warm weather is on the way. Whatever the reason, I like it! So here are five things I'd like to do this summer:

1. I want to buy a kayak. In 2006 I went on a week long sea kayak trip in Georgian Bay with Blackfeather Wilderness Adventures. We started out just north of Parry Sound, and travelled about 115km to Killarney. I think it was the hardest physical thing I ever did, given that 5 of the 7 days were spent paddling into strong winds (3-6 foot swells), and at night we slept on granite, with only a thin pad to soften it a bit. But it was beautiful - like traveling through a Group of Seven painting - and being a paddler (not a fan of motor boats, Seadoos, or anything noisy on the water), it appeals to me. So, I plan to buy a kayak for the cottage this summer, and spend time exploring the shoreline and finding the beaver dam. (Or mansion. With the number of trees decimated (GW) by the beavers this winter, the dam should be spectacular!)

2. I want to learn Italian. A few years ago I bought the Rosetta Stone DVD on eBay. It's been sitting on the side of my desk forEVER, and I haven't even cracked it open. Lazy, I guess. I have a good ear for languages, I love the sound of Italian, I have loved Italy each time I've visited, and I know I'll go back. Plus, it's good to learn new things to ward of dementia. It's true. 

Nel mercato di Rialto a Venezia.

3. I want to organize a block party on my street. I live on a cul-de-sac (dead end, really, but cul-de-sac sounds better) with about 20 houses on it. It's a perfect street for kids to ride their bikes and scooters, and for parents of said kids to sit outside together with a frosty beverage and chillax. There are a couple of families that I enjoy very much, a couple of, ummm... how shall I say it... interesting neighbours, and a whole host of folks I don't know other than to smile and say hi when they pass by. I think it would be great fun to organize a BBQ at the end of the summer - I've been saying it for years, so perhaps this will be the year to do it! (Kristy - they wouldn't do THAT in Burlington. Just sayin'.)

4. I want to get back into shape. I know, I know, I've said it before (most recenlty, in this post). This winter was, I'm sure you'll agree, a tad long. And due to some rotten health issues I had to deal with (successfully, I hasten to add), I was pretty much a sloth. A couch potato. A ne'er do well. But about 3 weeks ago I had an "a ha" moment when I realized I was better, and with the sun shining and spring bursting, I'm itching to get back outside and get healthy again. I will do it. See item number one above, and item number 5 below. Those two things, plus my gardening, my walking, and the abundance of fresh Ontario produce inspire me. 

5. Finally, I want to spend a lot of time here:

Doing this:

And of course this:

And this:

And just breathing in this:

Because this is the most wonderful place in the world. And it's full of the sounds and laughter and memories of these people. Even when they're not there.

The original six Hendersons, plus offspring

Things I want to do this summer...by (Angela) Jean

Last summer we were spoiled.

I was still on maternity leave, and since my husband is a high-school teacher, he was home too. We had 9 weeks of summer together with the kids before I returned to work in September. Glorious. We had the luxury of being able to get lots of work done on the house and in the garden without feeling like we were missing out on 'fun time' or 'family time'. We didn't need to do a lot of holiday planning in advance. We could plan outings spur-of-the-moment, if we wanted to. Like I said, spoiled!

This summer will be a different story. I am working full time, and my husband has taken an unpaid leave of absence to stay home with the kids. He has regular gigs on the weekends, and picks up extras when they are thrown his way. I have booked a few weeks of vacation spread out over the summer months, but if I want to fit in all of my plans we are going to need to be strategic.

As I may have mentioned before. I love making lists. A lot. This is my summer wish list.

I think I need some categories. 1) Around the house 2) Around the garden 3) Family stuff

Around the house 

1. Switch the kids' rooms. For a combination of reasons, the kid with the bigger bed, more furniture, more clothes, and generally more stuff, ended up in the smaller room with the smaller closet. I really enjoy a good room switch-a-roo so I'm pretty excited about this. This plan includes sewing new curtains for both rooms, sewing Otis a big-boy quilt for his big-boy bed and possibly some painting.

Around the garden

1. Plant a fantastic veggie garden. I have started some of my crop from seed this year so I'm off to a good start already. I promise to post more details about the garden soon.
2. Fix the fence. This is not sexy, or fun in any way, but it needs to be done. I hate those kind of projects.
3. Do 'something' with the area around the large tree in our front garden. I don't have a clear plan for what this might be, but I have put a call in to my Dad landscaping consultant and I am hoping he can come up with something brilliant.

Family/Fun Stuff

1. Big. Birthday. Party. Both of my kids and my husband have summer birthdays so we usually do one giant backyard party. I love having everybody here and doing it up right. This is one of my favourite events of the summer.
2. Get a family membership pass to either the Halton Region Conservation Parks or Provincial Parks. 
3. Take the kids to their first Jays Game.
4. Day trip to Centre Island. We had a great time there last year and I'm excited to go again.
5. Annual trip to Grand Bend to hang out with the Goossens Clan.

 I'm sure that other things will pop up, but those are my "must-do's". What are your plans for the summer?

Flora Interrupta...by (Angela) Jean

If you live anywhere near me, and from checking out our stats page I can tell that most of you do, (but a special shout out to our far-away readers--and I mean you: Hungary, China, UK, Germany, India, Singapore & New Zealand) you will have spent the last several weeks, if not months, complaining about the weather.

We have had a dismal, if not non-existent, spring. I can count the number of beautiful days on one hand, and the rest of them have been cold, and grey, and rainy...and did I mention grey?....and rainy? Sigh.

To illustrate how truly ugly it has been, I have prepared a photo comparison of the flora in my garden last year vs this year.

March 28, 2010

March 27, 2011

April 3, 2010

April 3, 2011

April 19, 2010

May 3, 2010-Lilacs in full bloom, tulips & daffodils almost finished for the season

May 5, 2011-Lilacs haven't even started to bloom, only a couple of tulips are out

May 3, 2010-gorgeous white double-bloom lilacs in all their glory

May 3, 2010-My favourite, classic light purple lilac

May 5-2011-The very same branch this year

May 3, 2010-leaves coming out on the weeping mulberry

May 5, 2011-Not a leaf bud in sight

May 3, 2010-Giant tulips

May 5, 2011-No flowers, just the kid

 And thus concludes our photo retrospective of the spring that never quite sprung.....yet.

Whatever Happened To... by Barbara (Ruth)

Just some random things I was wondering about recently - whatever happened to:

1. Evanescence? They've been around in one form or another since 1995, and had their big break in 2003 when they provided two tracks for the movie "Daredevil" (baaaad movie). 2003 was a time of heartache and angst for me. I still remember day after day going for a run, listening to "Bring Me to Life" and hanging on lyrics such as "now that I know what I'm without, you can't just leave me..." as if I were a lovesick teenager. Amy Lee was killing me softly with her song!
2. Kelly Gruber? Oh come on, you know who he is if you follow baseball at all. He was a big part of the 1992 World Series win for the Blue Jays. He hit for the cycle in 1989, won the gold glove in 1990, and was named Toronto's most eligible bachelor at one point. I used to love watching him at 3rd, and was devastated when he was traded in 1993. Rumour has it that he had a downward slide into drugs after he was traded to the Angels, but my research says he had surgery for a bone spur that ended his career. That's a pretty quick ending.
3. Real dinner parties? You know, the kind our parents had when people dressed up and came over without bringing a salad or a dessert. Everyone sat at the dinner table and used the good china and the silver. This was before "kitchen parties" and "BYOB". My Mom wore pearls, and I had to go in and say goodnight to the guests before I went to bed, and then I went to sit at the top of the stairs to listen to see if they said anything about me. Nowadays, it's insulting to go to a dinner party without taking something along. Frankly, I like doing the whole thing myself! (Perhaps that's a control issue...)
4. Unstructured play? I remember coming home from school, doing my homework, and waiting for the inevitable doorbell and "can Ruth come out to play?" My street was long and straight - perfect for games of kickball (or soccer baseball, to Canadians). We had a forest behind us in which we built numerous forts and treehouses. There was a stream for catching frogs and salamanders, and everyone's parents were home so we could end up at someone's house for a cold drink. We knew to go home when the lights came on (or when I heard my Dad's whistle - yes, we really had a family whistle!). Nowadays kids have such structured lives. I feel sad for what they're missing. Silken Laumann, Canadian rower and Olympian, wrote a book called "Child's Play" - I love the concept!
5. Bridge? My folks played bridge All. The. Time. My oldest sister and her husband still play on occasion, and I learned to play a long time ago but was never really very good at it. I still know how to bid and the essence of how to play, but I guess I'm not very strategic at games (I can't play chess, either). I think Euchre has taken over from bridge, but it seems so uncultured to me! Bridge was about card tables set in the living room, ashtrays, punch bowls, bridge mix, and Nuts & Bolts. Euchre is a loud game involving beer and wings and shouting BOO-YA!
6. Manners? I am sorry, but I think manners by the public in general have just gone to the dogs. Yesterday I bought a $185 worth of groceries, and the entire time the cashier didn't look at me or speak to me. And it's not just about customer service - people are generally ruder than they were a long time ago. It may be a generalization, but I find that most people don't hold doors for each other, men don't allow women to enter a door or an elevator first, people don't say "excuse me", and thank yous are few and far between. And don't even get me started on table manners.
7. Grammar? Ever read "Eats, Shoots, and Leaves?" No? You should. This book is about "zero tolerance for punctuation", and is a hilarious look at the forgotten comma and the overused apostrophe. Last year I saw a sign at Home Depot advertising "Red Rose's". I was thisclose to fixing it with a marker then and there. And if I make the mistake myself, I'm just mortified. Here's the joke that inspired the title of the book: A panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and proceeds to fire it at the other patrons. 'Why?' asks the confused, surviving waiter amidst the carnage, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder. 'Well, I'm a panda,' he says, at the door. 'Look it up.' The waiter turns to the relevant entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation. 'Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves.'

I could go on, but I won't. (For instance: Velveeta? Girl Guide uniforms? Parker Stevenson?)  Let me know if you have any "whatever happend to" thoughts. Maybe you can be a guest blogger!

Voting...by (Angela) Jean

As Canada heads to the polls today, Barbara Jean is musing on the topic of voting.

I grew up in a family where voting was taken very seriously, but party politics was rarely, if ever discussed. I'm sure my parents must have spoken to each other about their political choices but they never told us kids who they voted for. I remember asking on several occasions and being told straight out that "it was a secret ballot".

As a child I always wished that my house had one of the big signs out front. I didn't care what colour it was, just that we had one, but nope. No signs at our house.

Both of my parents were municipal civil servants so I'm sure that was part of it. They had to work directly with the elected officials after they came into power so advertising their preferences on the front lawn probably would not have been wise.

Even when I turned voting age and began to form my own political values my parents wouldn't influence me one way or the other. We often discussed values and what we felt were important qualities in leaders in general, but I still, to this day, am not sure which political party they support, if any.

Now, as a civil servant myself, I wonder if they felt the way that I do. I know that the political party in power has influence over the way that tax dollars are distributed, and how policy and programs are developed, but I also know that the day after the election, thousands of bureaucrats will go back to work and continue to keep the government running. They will deliver the services that the country needs to function. They will write the policies that determine how those services are delivered and they will look for ways to improve those services with the funds that have been allocated.

Civil servants can get a pretty bad rap sometimes, but in my experience, and really that's all any of us can speak to, I happen to have worked with several brilliant, dedicated and hardworking people who have a calling to make government work better.

But this post wasn't supposed to be about government, it was supposed to be about voting.

The act of voting has always been a very emotional experience for me. I get a lump in my throat when I enter the school gym, or local church basement. I look around at all of my neighbours who have taken the time out of their regular routine to stand up and be counted. I always think about how lucky we are to be able to do that, when in so many other places in the world the people have been silenced.

Voting day itself always reminds me of my dear friend Derek. Growing up, he was the person I knew who was most interested in politics and history. He knew the names and backgrounds of all the world leaders and loved a good debate--qualities that were extremely rare in my small town high-school circle. We would talk on the phone while watching the CBC coverage with Peter Mansbridge (in fact Mr. Mansbridge is associated with most of my memories of major world events...but that's another post entirely).

For the last 13 years, voting is something that my husband and I have done together. Each and every election day we walk to our local polling station to cast our ballots. Today, for the first time we went on our own. It just didn't work out, trying to juggle two kids, and my long day with commuting. I have to admit, it was not the same going by myself.

My wish for this voting day is that all my Canadian friends and family take the time to stand up and be counted. I believe that voting is not only our right, but also our responsibility.

Voting... by Barbara (Ruth)

John Quincy Adams, sixth President of the United States, said "Always vote for principle, though you may vote alone, and you may cherish the sweetest reflection that your vote is never lost."

Tonight is a big night for Canadians, although a disturbing and alarming number of us may not think so. Tonight we are choosing between 5 major political parties (or 4, if you're the debate organizers) for the right to govern our country in this time of political, economic, social, and environmental unrest.

I wouldn't want the job.

I also don't want ANY of the party leaders to have the job. Party platforms aside, I am dismayed by the antics and mud-slinging engaged in by the party leaders. I am sick of scandal, bad hair and bad eyebrow jokes, "targeted" ads (haven't yet seen one targeted at singles), unanswered questions and unsatisfying debates.

I also don't really like the parliamentary system, if truth be told. Although it has its flaws too, I much prefer the US system where voters choose local, state, and federal representatives separately. I'd love to have the choice to vote for a Liberal MP and a Conservative Prime Minister (not that I would!).

 But this is the way our country works, for better or worse.

The voter turnout in the US in 2008 was 56.8%, the highest since 1968 (when Nixon was elected). Of course 2008 was a pretty exciting election - I predict the same for 2012. In Canada in 2008 we had 58.8%, which sounds high but represents a fairly steady decline since the '80s when it was in the 75% range.

I'm really concerned that this election campaign has not inspired people to get out there and have their say. For the past few days I've been talking to just about anyone who will listen to get their views, and I am shocked by the number of well-educated, successful adults who feel that there is absolutely no point in voting because either a) it won't make a difference, b) there's no point any more, or c) they are too disgusted by the choices. One friend told me that two elections ago she voted green, the next she spoiled her vote, and this time didn't vote at all.

I asked one man what he thought would happen if all these people who think voting is a waste of time actually went out and voted. He said, "probably nothing. They would split the vote and then what's the point."

Am I too naïve? Is it really too much to think that a large group could make a difference?

I hope not. Rick Mercer, one of Canada's favourite political satirists, challenged Canadian youth to get out there and make their voices heard. You can learn more about the resulting "vote mobs" here in a blog written by a friend of mine. There are about 3 million students in this group - surely if they go out and vote it will make a difference and not just "split the vote". If this is true for the student vote, then it must also be true for the apathetic vote.

I'm not ashamed to say I voted Green tonight. One friend told me I wasted my vote. I don't think I did. I am tired of the "same old, same old" choices on election night, and I want another voice at the table. Do I want Elizabeth May? No. But right now, I want anyone who can to challenge the status quo, and I know that every vote the Green Party gets gives them $1.75 towards their future campaigns. I'm not sure how else to get the issues heard and discussed - I sure wasn't going to vote for the Marxist-Leninist candidate in my riding (!!). So for me it was (and has been for the past few federal elections) a considered choice.

I'm pretty sure I'm not going to like tonight's results, no matter what they are. But when people all over the world are literally dying for the right to live in a democratic society, I can't imagine NOT voting.

I am not sure what we can do about it. Anyone have any ideas? Maybe someone out there knows Ryan Reynolds, and can get him and a bunch of other Canadian stars (c'mon, there are some) to do a video like this:

I hope you voted.